White House Residents Day

We’ve departed from honoring good Honest Abe
               And Washington-who-never-told-a-lie,
To esteeming the one who made less than the Babe
               And that “Read-my-lips-folks-no-new-taxes” guy.

“How far we have fallen!” traditionalists cry,
               Pining for the Fathers-of-our-Country
On whose second-month birthdays they’d come to rely;
               Now they’re ready for some no-holds-barred confrontery.

They’re not dissing the Harrisons, Johnsons, or Polks,
               Nor Tyler-Taylor-Pierce-Buchanan-Grant;
They know that these all are elite sort of folks,
               The kind who think don’t-ever-think-you-can’t.

But our “Presidents’ Day” was (if anyone cares) 
               The result of shifting-market-paradigm:
To move George, Abe, and others from your purse to theirs...
               I.e., fooling-all-the-people-all-the-time.

                                                        —Anonest Abe Mouse