This Deal Was a Sine Qua Con
Have you heard of this insanity
Called “Cards Against Humanity”?
It’s allegedly a party game for people that are horrible
—not to mention gullible:
If you’re the dumbest dumb (or dumber)
You gave your charge card number
On a screen of black and white
At their colorful website,
And they charged a mere five bucks, and gave you nothin’ in return
—’cept the lesson that you’d learn.
The thousands that have fallen
For this swindle is appallin’,
Though I s’pose it isn’t like we haven’t seen it all before
—in long-gone days of yore:
From snake oil and the Edsel
To swamp land and USFL,
We fell for Ponzi schemes, New Coke,
And Windows Vista—what a joke!
So this Cards Against Humanity scam shouldn’t be a shock
—why, millions still have their Pet Rock!
It was THE Black Friday Deal,
The “without which” ’twasn’t real,
No matter what you plowed your way to fight for and to buy
—well, at least you made a try:
You pushed through crowds at Best-a-Buy,
Leaving nothing for the rest-ta-buy;
With a Target on your back,
You raced for deals on every rack;
But lest you’re googly-eyed from all their slick Black Friday patter
—Just let me say: ALL Fridays matter.
—Anon Against Hu-Mouse-ity