It’s hard to write a poem for the news that’s in the headline
When that news is not “the news” until mere hours after deadline.
See, here’s a World Series one—I thought it up and writ it,
But it would’ve been outdated by the time I could submit it:
From Almost Rags to Almost Riches
K.C. almost lost to the A’s;
After that, though, they went quite a ways…
And were almost World Champions, by gum—
If not for that Bumgarner bum.
And likewise for Election Day I had an inspiration
To write a verse like this one as the day’s commemoration—
But the time by which I had get it written and to send it,
Would’ve forced me into fudging the most fitting way to end it:
The Month of the PACyderm
Everyone loves to love elephants now:
The elephant bull, and the elephant cow,
And especially the cute little elephant calf—
So elephant-cute that you just have to laugh.
They’re the biggest of mammals (well, next to the whale)
And more popular now than a truckload of kale.
Yes, elephants these days, are loved a whole lot—
Although at the ballot box…maybe, maybe not….
—Anon A. Elephant
So instead I’ll simply leave you with some little lines I wrote,
Which you may not think amount to much, and seem of little note,
But express a timeless truth that deadlines never can defeat
Not even if the editor should (PLEASE!) turn up the heat:
kNOwing your ire,
your VEhement desire
for benuMBing our limbs,
hope of warmER days dims.